Posts Tagged ‘goodness’

Into great depression – What is like to live in the Balkans?

Wednesday, May 18th, 2011

I'm so depressed these days that I'm trying to write something decent here but everytime I try I do stop and delete all I have written and start from scratch again.
It's terrible, I believe everyone have this days and they're so dark that even the smallest ray of light is gone somewhere…

The causes for depression are multiple, I know we're entering into the season period and that could be a factor, but truly for a long time I haven't felt that bad and I really cannot find the true cause. It's like hunting the unexplained.
Being a citizen of a countries on the balkans brings a lot of questions which cannot get answered. Why we the Balkan and more specificly most of the Orthodox Christian countries are suffering so badly and economically in constant crisis and recession?
From a material perspective Bulgaria is one of the worst countries one can live in, we the people on the balkans are chronically depressed and it really seems like a downward spiral
We've been gone through so far, when I was a child we were teached in the spirit of communism and a believe in a hard material realities.

Communism has taught us we're all fleshly brothers and we should live in groups and stick to the group, now as the democracy come it's on the contraty, we're being constantly re-taught that we should leave behind the group kind of thinking and all built from communism destroy it all and build the new society… We're told by individualist nations like USA and Western europe that the only thing for the good of a person is to (get an absolute individualistic life and only exist for the greater goodness of each ones self as individuals..

As with everything the Balkans are notable for being a very unordered place. Living here is like living in chaos…
The social security policies here are not working, the jurisdiction is working on behalf of the rich, the police force is seriously disfunctional and easily bribable. Put next to all this shit a high levels of unemployment and a lot of unhappy depressed people crawling around the streets and you get the picture …
As a normal consequence most of the young people have entered a dark ways of alcoholism and hard-core nihillism.
There are high level of people who are oriented into the new dark realities of Metal or underground music.
Each philosophy that is being put in from the west is being adopted here and being multiplied million times and mostly the bad things are being adopted and less rarely the good ones…
It's so mixed up that nobody can explain why it is happening as it is here.
I really am trying hard to convince myself for a years now that it is worthy to live here but the more I live here in Bulgaria the more I see all is getting worser than getting for good.

I wonder for how long it will go this pointless way, we the balkan people are living in ruins literally.

The only light we still have is the Church, but very sadly most people has left behind the faith and prefer to follow the fake American dream than to obey to our old ways and traditions.

Globalisation has entered in the Balkans in a full-force and is destroying our ancient culture and traditions and building the fakeness of the coca-cola culture that most of the people prefer to adore nowdays …

Bulgaria's population is mostly based of old people and we're a dying nation, if a miracle doesn't happen then we definitely will be gone.

A living saint in Bulgaria Dqdo (Elder) Dobri of Baylovo village – The living Christ example we Christians should follow

Saturday, April 2nd, 2011

elder-dobri-from-baylovo-a-great-saint-like-example-christians-should-follow

In this dark days of humanity, we can rarely find persons who live in a holy way like the saints from the Holy Bible or the Books of the Living of the Saints

Saintship has been slowly disappearing from earth just like it's prophecised by Christ our Saviour and the Holy Apostles and in later times by many monks, Church hierarchs, patriarchs and hermits.

In Bulgaria as in most parts of the Orthodox world the Christian faith apostacy is also clearly seen.
We can no longer see saint hermits like our patron saint of Bulgaria Saint John of Rila

Even in this dark days God still shows mercy to us and still present us some of his saints.
The topic of this article as you have already red in the title is Elder Dobri of the Baylovo village

Elder Dobri of Baylova has been a regular person like all of us with a family and children just until 12 years ago.
About 12 years ago the I would call him The Living saint has decided to let all the earthly passions and sorrows for Christ and his eternal salvation.
He despised the earthly goodness and become a beggar, all the collected money he got were distributed among other poor people or donated to Churches and monasteries belonging to the Bulgarian Orthodox Church.

Day by day and a coin by coin, he has collected thousands of levs (the bulgaria national currency).
The gathered money were given to support the live of monasteries and Churches, by this very date. This old man is the greatest donator for the Cathedral Church St. Alexsander Nevski (situated at the heart of Bulgaria's capital Sofia)

His words spoken just like the saints are full of grace and goodness. One of his famous sayings are:

Man has Always two wills in himself in every moment of his life, the will to do good and the will to do evil
As all the truths his sayings are simple but represent the ultimate truth which was also said in many other forms in The Holy Bible Gospels and God's law.

The external outlook of Dqdo Dobri is also saintly, he has long beard a shining eyes and a national folklore dress.
He looks like he has been out of some old Bulgarian tale.

It's very striking fact that he that this old man is the biggest donator for our Cathedral Temple, we have many millionaires and businessman in Bulgaria but nobody has decided to donate to our Church such a high sum of money.

Elder Dobri's donation for the St. Alexander Nevski's Church is in value 35700 levs (around 19000 euros).
Dqdo Dobri is a beggar for Christ, this is one of the major types of saintship we read about in the living of the saints.
All the collected money from people are given for God's Glory. It's amazing heroism and an example, all we the Christians should follow to fulfill Christ's law of love and inherit the internal salvation.
A friend of mine who has the blessing to see Elder Dobri with her own eyes and have a small talk with him, has shared with me that even though he wears an old ragged clothes, his clothes and body emit a roses like odor!

As the fame about the same has grown these days, the Bulgarian National television has prepared a small video about the saint. I believe the video as a true blessing for us the Christians and will encourage us to persist in the good deads.
Here I present you the videos you can see the living saint, I hope by his holy prayers God will show mercy to all us who watch his graceful words:


The Living Christian Saint from Baylovo Village – Bulgaria


Elder Dobri from Baylovo – Bulgaria

Inteview with Elder Dobri in his house in Baylovo (the interview is in Bulgarian)

The greatest tracker (demoscene) composers / Purple Motion, Necros, Skaven, Pro-XeX

Thursday, July 29th, 2010

For all of us who yet remember the Demoscene , Purple Motion, Necros and Skaven are absolutely legendary names.
Their music work contribution for tracked Electronic music, video games music and general development of the IT culture is truly invaluable.

Many younger computer users (I’m 26 now), and probably IT starters would probably never heard about neither Demoscene nor Purple Motion or the other three patriarchs of tracked Electronic music.

This musicians have a special value for people who has ever composed music with Impulse Tracker and the many other programs to compose music from samples.

Purple Motion has his own home page for quite some time now, however I just noticed that he has recently turned his home page to a PHPBB Forum where there is plenty of information about the composer as well as open discission and many questions and answers of people who are interested into the great electronic composer.

The “foster-father” of tracked electronic music is Necros.
Necros is the Artistic Pseudonim of Andrew Sega, probably his most notable piece of music work is called mech8Mechanism 8 .

The third by significance electronic musician who is probably known by the many old school computer users and musicians is Skaven .
Skaven is part of the Future Crew .

One of the most notable Skaven music works is actually the soundtrack song produced for the Second RealityDemo .
It’s worthy to say few words about Future Crew as well, Future Crew (link to wikipedia)
– “Future Crew is a now-defunct group of Finnish computer coders and artists who created PC demos and software, active mostly between 1992 and 1994.”
You might also consider checking Necros profile in modarchive
There you can find plenty if not all of his works for download and listening.
A descendant of the the 3 up-mentioned wonderful tracker musicians is Pro-XeX also known under the artistic pseudonim Necroleak
Though his works are much later first originating from the distant 1995 his works are comparable by quality and goodness to (PM, Necros and Skaven’s works).
If you really want to completely turn back some memories about the good old times when we used to use DOS environment and to listen the great old MOD, S3M, XM etc. songs with the good old Cubic player which is already available under the free port called Open Cubic Player

A port is even available for most UNIX platforms You can download and install the Linux / Unix port of Cubic player here plus on the below link you will find some brief instructions on how to make it work on Debian, Ubuntu, Redhat, Gentoo and FreeBSD.

Under Debian Lenny, Squeeze/Sid installing opencubicplayer is pretty easy and comes to simple installation via apt-get as follows:

debian-desktop:~# apt-get install opencubicplayer

First time I’ve noticed Cubic player I should admit it was a real joy to know there is already a Unix port since Linux and BSD are my OS choice for almost 10 years already.
Another possible way to play the old school songs on Linux is through the well known console player mikmod
I’ve prepared a downloadable song archive for each of the 3 great electronic composers (Purple Motion, Necros, Skaven) on my personal webserver.

Below I present you with links to their music.

Download all tracked music by Purple Motion

Download Necros composed music works

Download the songs composed by Skaven

Download a collection of all composed songs by Pro-XeX / Necroleak

I have few other composers who are very liked by me, their music works can be obtained through my tracked music tiny collection available here

Many of the demos created and works by Jonne Valtonen known under the artistic pseudonim Purple Motion are currently uploaded and available for watching via Youtube – (search) Purple Motion

I’ll close this post with a the Award Winning Demos (Second Reality and Panic) which are the most notable produced Computer Simulation Demos of all times created by the collossal Future Crew group.


Second Reality by Future Crew [ Winner Demo of Assembly ’93 competition ]


Panic by Future Crew


Toasted by Cubic Team & $een
Also don’t forget to check The ultimate source for MOD Music – modarchive.org

6 days in sickness

Friday, August 10th, 2007

My physical health was quite not good during the last 6 / 7 days. Today it was a quiet day.I haven’t prayed seriously for few days but I can’t. Since my life looks like going nowhere.There is almost nothing in this town which keeps me still. I went to the Old Dobrich inMino’s coffee. But after a little argue and being a little rude to a girl I leavedthis awful mess. This guys are not a good company/match for me. It seems I don’t have friendsexcept Lily. Well I hope at least I haven’t builded all the time for nothing.Thanks Goodness that at least at work there isn’t a lot of work so I’m in a period of recovery.The world is going mad. I’m starting to scare my self. Seems like, life is created to be livednot to think about it’s purpose.END—–