A terrible times
The SHR project is going nowhere, the teachers are playing with the
group. Right now I'm drinking Amstel, yesterday I tried The Dutch
beer Grolsh it wasn't bad by the way. I'm completely convinced that
my family has no love for me. I've recently suffered with a
constipation again (a bit more than 3 days without a complete
poop). I'm trying to eat as much food I red is good to be ate in
cases of constipation, howver I still have difficulties when
pooping. Happily with God's help I was able to poop today twice
even thought I felt like I couldn't poop completely again. I'm
starting to think that this problem's source are more deep. I
experienced the same a couple of times previous year. The food here
is also a reason. The food is simply terrible. I have absolutely no
idea what to do next in my life. I don't know what will happen with
this university it will be really ridiculous if I didn't succeed
this semester I've prayed so much to God with a requests to grant
me graduate this times. Two days ago I woke up eary in 6:00 o'clock
in the morning because my room was filled with a weed odour
probably some mate was smoking weed, it is so terrible in this
country. I have absolutely no idea what to do with myself next even
if I graduate. Today I went to the bathroom at least 30 times (or
more) attempting to bring some poo, my stomach was swollen and I
couldn't bring the poop out ... I'm constantly thinking about
becoming a priest or a monk right after I graduate. There is no
much that really hold me to this world. My health problems causing
frequent urination are calling up again ... it's really hard to
live in this condition I don't understand why God doesn't heal me
from that but anyways I cannot do much about. I couldn't pray much
anymore, I also feel so weak and tired this days. It's getting
darker and darker in this world. The weather is getting more and
more insane, probably the day of the lord is coming near. Apart
from that today I went to Ina's home cause we had to work on the
IBP plan. I've asked a friend of mine to design a logo for our
company and he did a great job. Tomorrow we have to meet the
teacher and ask him about what we have as a plan so far. Later on I
went to Sali and helped to Mimi (his wife) to peel some potatoes,
afterwards Sali borrowed me one of his bikes as he usually does and
we went for a drive around in the city. We went throught the city
center the Sonsbeek park and another park near Sonsbeek after which
we came back to his place. His wife Mimi treated me with some fried
potatoes which was pretty nice I haven't eaten fried potatoes for
maybe 5 months. That's mostly what is happening, anyways I should
thank God for his abundant mercies to me the sinner. Glory be to
The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit now and forever and ever!
Amen!