A meaningless life – And Ulcer one Heavy Cross I have to wear

Suffering from Ulcer gives you so much pain and discomfort and makes you so irritated and nervous. That often you think what the crack, why I ever live. I don't want this suffering anymore but want peace and confort, but I have to bear the heavy cross as the Lord Jesus Christ suffered even worser for our salvation.

Suffering from Deodenum Ulcer is one of the things I don't wish you to suffer from. I've been struggling with this diasease already for years and at certain times when you get worsened you get totally out of your mind!
You can do a lot of things and say a lot of things which eitherwise wouldn't because of this terrible Ulcer diasese but I pray the Lord to forgive me for I have hurted many people because of the sickness. People who suffer from Ulcers are more easy to irritating. Sometimes I wonder why I have to suffer with this Ulcer, after all I'm striving for the good and believe in Jesus Christ who healed ALL kind of diaseses
I know i've done a lot of sins and break up God's commandment and I deserve to suffer but still its hard to accept..

 Oh God have mercy
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